Inga-Britt Ostrom, MFT
Couple Therapy – a new beginning
By Inga-Britt Ostrom, LMFT
When the romantic phase of your relationship wanes and the honeymoon is over,
you may argue more than you like to admit, you may feel increasingly distant
from your partner, while yearning for closeness. You find that talking about
sensitive problems often leads nowhere, except to your side of the bed. This
does not mean that love is gone. Some individuals “put up with” the daily
frustration; some deny their feelings; some leave the relationship, and others
seek out couples therapy.
Creating lasting relationships
Studies show that couples therapy is effective in improving the quality of
relationships and in supporting people to adjust to change. A relationship is not a
static state between two unchanging people. Rather, the relationship shifts and
grows, and like many others, I view relationship as a psychological
and spiritual journey that acts as a catalyst for growth and transformation.
Would you and your partner benefit from couple therapy?
If you are motivated, have some understanding of your current issues, and want
to improve your relationship, you are likely to benefit from therapy. In
some cases, it may be necessary to do some individual work
prior to engaging in couples work.
What can you expect from couple therapy?
Did you know that it is extremely rare that one
partner is solely responsible for a flawed or damaged relationship?
During treatment, you may be asked to accept responsibility for
ways in which you too contribute to the difficulties or problems in your
During sessions, we will explore individual needs, expectations and
differences. You will recognize how negative patterns and behaviors from
childhood, or past relationships, are impacting your current situation.
You will master new and effective communication skills. You will learn to express
feelings such as anger and hurt directly, without hurting one another.
You will learn to deal with and resolve conflict openly, in ways that you may have not
learned in the past, at home or at school. During treatment, partners learn to
cultivate respect, patience and compassion toward each other.
Couple Counseling – an investment in your future
Many couples consider couples counseling their greatest investment. However,
treatment may sometimes be difficult, extensive and costly. It takes courage and
strength to ask for help and engage in self-exploration.
Progress and development
The rate at which partners make progress depends upon the level of motivation
and severity of problems. During my work with couples I have gained
profound respect for the people I have treated. They come with enthusiasm and
readiness to work hard to restore or
strengthen their relationship.
I feel enormous gratitude as I see the rekindling of love .
Love has a chance to blossom, when Men and Women are able
to respect and accept their differences. – John Gray